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#notokillingsinnigeria

on March 24, 2019

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Marriage Adrift

Marriages rarely collapse suddenly. They drift quietly—through silence, avoidance, fatigue, and unmet emotional needs. What often feels like “nothing is wrong” is actually something important being ignored. This self-assessment is not about blame . It is not about fault-finding . It is about awareness . Awareness is the first step toward repair. Answer honestly. This is for you. HOW TO ANSWER For each statement, select the option that best reflects your experience in the last 3–6 months . 0 — Not true 1 — Sometimes true 2 — Often true 3 — Very true THE SELF-ASSESSMENT Emotional Connection I feel emotionally safe sharing my fears, frustrations, or disappointments with my spouse. We talk about logistics more than we talk about our inner lives. I often feel lonely—even when we are together. I no longer feel deeply known by my spouse. Communication & Conflict Difficult conversations are postponed or avoided. When we disag...

My Friend Sammie Okposo: When Calling Outlives Applause (1971–2022)

There are people you meet at the beginning of their stories, and there are people you meet mid-journey—already shaped by forces you can sense but not fully explain. That has always been the case with Sammie Okposo . To call Sammie merely a gospel musician is to miss the point. He was first a pilgrim—someone who consistently chose the long road when shortcuts were available, someone who never seemed in a hurry to be famous, only faithful. His life read less like a career arc and more like a slow, deliberate unfolding. Sammie and Uvoh at Flint, Michigan, during a water crisis. Where the Song Began Sammie was born in Lagos, but his childhood followed the rhythm of his father’s work—Lagos, Port Harcourt, and eventually Warri. While other children were learning to settle, Sammie was learning to adapt. Stability, for him, did not come from geography; it came from faith, family, and music. Sammie' son, Fejiro Music was not introduced into his life; it surrounded him. His father was a cho...

Mission to Venezuela

At DSC Technical High School, we read King Solomon's Mines. Maps stained with danger! Men propelled by courage! Distant lands waiting to be discovered! Only decades later did the question arrive: what exactly were we being taught? Morality? Or conquest with better PR? Long before press briefings and legal memoranda, there was a story we told ourselves: men who crossed borders with courage as their visa, who stepped over rules as though rules were shrubs, who returned with treasure because the story said they must. The land was silent. The gold was waiting. The law had no speaking role. That story grew legs. Strong ones. It jogged through centuries, picked up speed during the colonial era, briefly went to the gym during the Cold War, and today it's running marathons in business casual attire. The mine is gone now, but the instinct thrives. The treasure has learned new names: democracy, stability, freedom, strategic interests, and—my personal favorite—the necessity of correcti...

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